This is the bedding track for a song with words called “Never Enough”. The lyric concerns greed and the age-old fact that the more money you want the more money you need. So many people chase the dollar and find themselves corrupted by their need for cold, hard cash. But more so, it is about those people who will stab you in the back for the chance to screw you out of a pound.
The interesting thing about this track is that it is the first time I’ve used the Superior Drummer 2.0 software I purchased a month or so ago in order to generate the drum track. In the past, I’ve programmed the drums myself using a Boss DR880, but this new software allows me to drag and drop pre-rendered midifiles onto a grid and come up with realistic sounding drumparts on the fly. So yes, it is another way for me to cheat – so no more crappy drum programming for me, perhaps? No, I still love my DR-880 and it is good to get your hands dirty.
The original Wicker Man movies is one of my all-time faves up there with 2001, Superman, Confessions of a Pop Performer and Xanadu. But someone has created a rather disturbing spin on an already disturbing story…beholden, dear reader, beholden…
This is a video from some chubby lad called Paul Hawkins and his band The Awkward Silences. I am not sure why I like because both the song and the video are a little rough, but I guess it captures the awkward fizzing energy of younger people who think they are right.
Of course, I also like the Reggie Perrie theme running through the video and it has the same kind of appeal as The Fall or The Wedding Present, so I am beginning to understand why I’s likes it.
I was completely unaware of the Philips range of AmBX environmental lighting available for the home PC, until I received an email from eBuyer telling me they were selling these units for £25 (plus two top games). They were previously £130 and I love a bargain. I am not sure if these are a great piece of kit or a waste of technology. I must admit that the lights do appear to reduce eyestrain when using the screen for long periods.
However, they are quite hypnotic and when used in conjunction with a movie (the lights match the colour action of the screen) it really does draw the eye into the movie. You see this kind of thing in high-end home cinema kits, but for £25 it is a good bit of fun.
Another reason I bought it was I wanted to impress Verity. One of the roles of fatherhood is being a sort of shamanistic wizard figure who can conjure lights and stars with his bare hands. A while ago I bought one of those laser planetarium thingies to impress her and now Verity demands she sees the stars before she goes to bed. Of course, she was very impressed by the flashing lights…
Just sold out of my initial short run of Every Thing You Have Ever Owned is Mine, which means that this CD has recouped its publishing costs. Need to press some more (as well as replacing the sold out EchoNET and God Pays Debts Without Money…). The only CDs not to have paid for themselves so far is Here Comes the Future and Improvisations, which is a shame ‘cos they ain’t that bad.
In ye olde days, I was blighted by insomnia. I have a bit of a love/hate relationship with sleep. Or maybe it’s that by nature I am a nocturnal creature preferring to beaver around when everyone is in bed. I like it late at night when there’s no-one about. It is if I have the whole world to myself (obviously that’s not quite true because on the other side of the world it is daytime).
Anyway, having children and a lifestyle that doesn’t lend itself to my various nocturnal activities (mainly recording music), my insomnia used to be a thing of the past. But ever since the incident, my sleep patterns are all over the shop. I’ve actually gone quite insane, really. Now I stay up in the (probably) misguided notion that if I am awake during these hours, nothing bad will happen to the house and if it does I am instantly on hand to ferry everyone to safety and deal with the miscreants. The incident has really fucked me up.
So this song is about what it is like to be me and trying to get to sleep. It’s short, but sometimes when I lie in bed I honestly feel that if I do go to sleep that I might never rise again. I worry that I won’t be there for the kids, that the stress of my situation my somehow finish me off. I’ve been aware of my mortality since I was five years old and when I have an attack of imagining my last breath, I now get very upset, because I want to life forever just so I can be there for the chlidren. What a sad pathetic fuck I’ve become, eh? My attack of shingles before Christmas was a warning signal about my health and stress levels, but there’s very little I can do until I extricate myself from this mess. Ahh, I could give you the details but who wants to hear yet another sob story? Boo-hoo. Grow some balls, man, ferchrissakes…
Hold On Till Morning
And I lay here in the darkness
And I can hear the baby breathing
And I feel your heat beside me
And I pray I have the strength to carry on
The tension in my chest
Tightens like a press
And the world spirals
So far away from me
The Coils of Sleep
Won’t drag me deep
As I worry on the how’s and now’s
Trying to find a way out
And I hope I can hold on
Till the early morning birdsong
Signals I’ve survived another night
And I’m greeted by the same familial sight
And you’ll are there by my side
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