Yes, it is Mushroom season and I’ve been snapping the local funghi as I take Alex the Wonderdog for his constitutional drag. It’s funny because the same types of mushroom seem to appear at the same spots every year. Fascinating, eh? Oh, you’ve nodded off already. Well I think mushrooms are great and I like the way that they have a limited life span and are a step between the animal and vegetable world.
A joke:
Q. Why don’t goblins live in toadstools like fairies?
A. Because there’s not mushroom…
It’s OK – you can have that one for free.
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A particularly miserable dream sets the mood for the day. I’m not telling the dream because, well, I’ve decided to “edit” what appears on this site. Don’t want certain things to be read by certain people. Mysterious stuff, eh? Anyway, this dark cloud that came down is hanging around me and has done for the past week or so. I try and lift it with music, dog walking, guitar playing, cider drinking, but it is deep at the heart of me. It can only be described as a combination of abject misery and apathy. I don’t like it, but I knew it was coming when I put the finishing touches on my “God Pays Debts” music box-set. Whenever a large project finishes, the depression comes along to fill the vacuum that was once held at bay by being creative.
But at the moment, I am just fed up with everything. Every time I try and do something positive and forward-moving, I get knocked back. Everything ends with nothing. I’m tired of trying. Maybe I am not trying hard enough. I don’t know. What I do know is that the decluttering continues and I have decided to sell the rest of my record collection – holding back certain titles that are dear to me. I look at all the CDs in the crates and think back to a different time, to a different Darren, a younger, more youthful, more optimistic Darren. I know I can’t be that man anymore, so the CDs and the past have to go. You can’t hold onto these things.
As I have said to The Missus, if the house was on fire I’d make sure she and the dog were safe first before running back into the house to retrieve items that mean something to me. Would I retrieve my record collection? No. Instead, I would probably retrieve my guitar and my own CDs. Again, I think the problem is that I am listening/creating my own music more and so I don’t really have the inclination to listen to anyone else’s. Maybe this is an insular view but it’s what’s working for me at the moment.
I need a new project to work on, but feel too tired to engage with my guitar or anything else. The remaining energy I have I have to put aside for work. This could be down to the onset of winter, I don’t know. Got to take the rough with the smooth, no? As a great philosopher said:
Got to pay your dues if you wanna sing the blues,
And you know it don’t come easy.
You don’t have to shout or leap about,
You can even play them easy.
Forget about the past and all your sorrows,
The future won’t last,
It will soon be over tomorrow.
I don’t ask for much, i only want your trust,
And you know it don’t come easy.
Got the confirmation last night from CDBABY that they had received 5 copies of “Sow’s Ears” and 5 copies of “Without Words” – so those titles are back in stock. I was surprised as we only posted them on Monday and they got all the way to Ohio, US of A in less than 3 days. Wowser! The new postal rates are frankly “doing my head in”. A small padded envelope containing a DVD now costs more to post to the UK than sending five CDs to America – this is thanks to the revised postal charges which take size and thickness as well as weight into account. Of course, it could be that we got overcharged. But the bottom line is that these postal charges are obscenely complicated to work out if you are a common or garden sprout like me. I expect some boffin with thick glasses is sitting in Royal Mail HQ shrugging his shoulders and saying: “It all makes perfect sense to me.”
I received two helpful emails from CDBABY today giving me direct links to my albums on iTunes and eMusic.
LINKS TO ITUNES
Darren Lock: Textures
http://phobos.apple.com/WebObjects/MZStore.woa/wa/viewAlbum?playListId=4151131
Darren Lock: Without Words
http://phobos.apple.com/WebObjects/MZStore.woa/wa/viewAlbum?playListId=18757324
Darren Lock: Sows’ Ears & Silk Purses
http://phobos.apple.com/WebObjects/MZStore.woa/wa/viewAlbum?playListId=18757802
EMUSIC LINKS
Darren Lock: Without Words
http://www.emusic.com/album/10855/10855640.html?fref=700329
Darren Lock: Sows’ Ears & Silk Purses
http://www.emusic.com/album/10855/10855435.html?fref=700329
Darren Lock: Textures
http://www.emusic.com/album/10855/10855306.html?fref=700329
Here’s the stereo audio of that improvised track I posted earlier today.
CLICK HERE
Uploading video files to MySpace is screwed up again, so I am hosting this one at YouTube in mono. I was just goofing around, trying to get a loop going and riffing over it. Again, this sounds much better in glorious stereo, but until MySpace sorts itself out, this is the best I can do.
This one will also be eventually added to my RSS feed for those of who are a subscriber. If you are not, you can subscribe by clicking on the RSS link to the left the screen or cutting and pasting the URL into your podcast downloader, such as iTunes. However, I am also having trouble uploading stuff to my website, so until I get that fixed, I can’t host any large files.
See – making ambient droning noises really is cat’s play:
Recent events have caused me to throw myself at the mercy of employers and with cap in hand, spit and polish on my CV and hope in my heart. Last week, I applied for about 10 positions and one of them was quite local. I liked the sound of it and visualised myself doing the journey to work. I spoke to the lady at the agency dealing with my application and felt that I had made a good impression with my experience and general keeness. That was on Tuesday…and yesterday afternoon, I received an email saying I had been unsucessful. When I pressed them further, I was told that the position had been given to a temp who had been working there. Well why fricking advertise the job as being available? Are you doing this just to waste my time and give me false hope? My inherent opinion that all job agencies are useless remains unabated. Another rejection from another agency appeared in my inbox not long after. It was a great end to a particularly dismal Friday.
But heck, I am not going to be put off by a set-back. I have other things going for me like my terrible music. And yes, I have finally managed to pull my finger out of my rear and finish “God Pays Debts Without Money…”. I spent most of the today pulling together the first copies and it is all registered wth CDBABY. All I’ve got to do now is send them off to America on Monday. To say I am proud is an understatement as I am particularly pleased with how it all turned out. Now I am at a loss with what to do with myself musically speaking.
A table full of my CDs ready for the off
Yup, both “Without Words” and “Sows’ Ears” have sold out so I have to send some more stock out too. So it is going to be a very expensive day at the Post Office on Monday!